The Boat Coach: What's in a Name?

Personal Stories Behind Boat Names

In the famous balcony scene in Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet,” Juliet muses, “That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” She argues that a name is arbitrary and superficial. Juliet proved to be fatally wrong when it came to the feuding Capulets and Montagues.

When it comes to naming boats, most owners put a lot of thought and meaning into the name, which often reveals something about them. Some humorously address the high cost of boating with names such as Goin’ Broke or N2Deep. My father-in-law named all of his yachts Migraine because he alleged that owning a boat always leads to headaches.

Some names are suggestive, such as Nauti Buoy or Wet Dream. Most of those are owned by single men. Many names reveal something about the owner’s occupation. Butt Doctor may belong to a proctologist, Royal Flush to a plumber and Crime Pays to a bail bondsman. Wine and Crime may belong to a couple in which she is a wine broker and he is a police officer.

Fishermen can come up with very creative names for their boats. Fish & Chicks, Reel Obsession, Abaco Office, Wave Paver, Job Site and Castaway are some I have seen recently on the water.

When my son and his buddy found an old aluminum jon boat for sale, they bought it together, added a 1960 Evinrude 9-horsepower outboard and named it Friendship. They plied the mangroves, fishing for redfish, snook and sea trout, for years in that boat.

My first boat as an adult was a 40-foot Fuji sailboat. It was a heavily built, bluewater, cutter-rigged ketch already named No Tan Lines. The owner explained that he entered the boat in local regattas with an all-female crew. Because it was a bluewater boat, it was not particularly suited for racing. To get the competition to slow down, the women would not wear any clothes, thus the name No Tan Lines.

When I took delivery of the boat in Fort Lauderdale, I had a male friend come with me. We had to call dozens of drawbridges, and each time we had to give the name of the vessel. Out of curiosity, the bridge tender would, of course, come out to see whether the implied name was factual.

A boat's name is more than just lettering on the hull. For many owners, it reflects a memory, a passion, a profession or a sense of humor.

By the time we reached Port Canaveral, I had gathered the proper documentation and learned the ritual for changing the boat’s name without invoking the wrath of Poseidon or Neptune. My Scottish grandmother, Grace McGregor, had recently died at 98. I was very close to her, so I wanted to name the boat after her without choosing something overly sentimental that would invite questions.

The traditionally rigged boat was beautiful, with a blue hull and teak and brass brightwork, so I named her Celtic Grace. It was a fittingly beautiful name with deep meaning for me.

Our present boat, a 23-foot center console, is named PFD. Most people assume it means “personal flotation device,” as we intended. However, it actually stands for “Present for Father’s Day.” I must say, it was a great gift.

What Boat Names Tell Us About Boaters

When you are on the water or in a marina and see the name of a boat, try to figure out why the owner chose it. Sometimes it is easy, such as She Got the House or Reel Time, while others are more esoteric, such as XTA Sea or Almost There.

See you on the water.

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